Are you a giver or a taker?

Have we become a society of people that take take take and give nothing?  Look at the environment...we have destroyed the world around us, and given nothing back.  And now we can't even begin to get mobilized behind an effort to prevent global warming.  Think about the hunger and homelessness that exists across the world and even in our country. 

I am thinking about this in terms of friendships and relationships.  Do you ever just feel that you give a lot and get nothing in return, except for the label, friend or mate?  When did we become a society that is totally focused on self...when did it become --- "we hold these truths to be SELF-INTERESTED...?" 

As a young girl, I learned to share...to give unselfishly...to love with reckless abandon.  Were my parents wrong in teaching me these, what I consider very basic rules to life?  No, I don't think so.  I just think that somewhere in this world where we have become nothing but reckless consumers...the basic rules of giving and sharing have been lost in the everyday chaos.  Now, I am not naive in thinking that every interaction or relationship will be 50 - 50 give and take, because truth be told, some people are just better at giving and others are better at taking.  However, I don't think a relationship has much value if only one person shares.  

When is the last time you just called a friend and wanted to hear how his/her life was going?  And no matter the issue, you just wanted to GIVE of yourself by being there.  When is the last time you did something really special for your boyfriend/girlfriend, husband/wife...something that would make their life easier, just because you wanted to see them smile?  When is the last time you set out to make someone happy without expecting anything in return?

People today have lost sight of important things.  We are all consumed with ambition and social climbing and being wealthy, without recognizing that a rich life is one that is surrounded with people that we love and that love us.  We all often take people for granted, thinking that they will always be around.  What happens when the person you have been feeding off of decides that they have nothing left to give?  If you are a societal parasite, its time you released your hold and give back some of all that you have taken.  And for those of us that give give give until we are bone dry, it's time to take back some of yourself. 

Ask yourself today, are you a giver or a taker?....Evaluate your friendships and relationships and decide what you can do better...how you can love more...and how you can give more of yourself so the relationship won't be so one-sided!  To give is to receive and to love is to be loved!

....and that's straight out of the she-spot...

D

FALL in Love (Autumn Soul)

I woke up this morning and could feel the cool air all around me.  It dawned on me...it's Fall.  Autumn is the time where it's chilly in the mornings, but it gets warm by Noon.  The colors of the leaves brighten the sky, and we all begin to pull out our wintery layers to prepare for the first frost.  Despite the fact that I am totally a summer person and love the heat of mid-July, when I got up this morning, I thought about more than just the nature of fall.  I contemplated winter approaching, and how you think about wanting to be close to someone, to share your space with someone, and to find yourself cuddled up in sweats with the person that you desire.

Ahhh, yes, for me Autumn is the time for love.  There is nothing better than sweat-pants, your favorite movie, and chocolate brownies, all while snuggling up on the couch with your sweetie.  Hmmm, let me put this in terms that my male readers can understand.  For the men, there's nothing better than having your girl wearing your favorite white t-shirt, sitting on the couch in front of your big screen, while watching Saturday college football or the Sunday NFL, while snacking on some wings and a Sam Adams Octoberfest beer! 

At any rate, the play time of the summer is over.  The Friday Happy Hours have concluded, vacations have come to an end, school is back in session, people are back on the grind, and of course, love is in the air.  I can smell the love of fall like sweet potato pie at Thanksgiving.  Although it is getting cold outside, the air feels warm and fragrant... .  Yes, yes...Autumn is upon us, and love is everywhere.  Whoever said spring was the season for love and new beginnings.  Fall represents continued love and comfort. 

Happy Fall Everyone!  Enjoy the beauty of the season...and let's all get comfortable...and Naked! (Ha)

And that's straight out of the she-spot...

---D

Life's Chaos 1 - Don't we date any more!

I start this blog with asking the question...do people even date any more?  It seems to me that everyone, especially men, have been comfortable with as soon as they meet you...getting all up in your space...without what my parents used to call the courtship.  Whatever happened to the days of old, where a man would take you out to a nice movie or restaurant and then drop you off at the front door, all the while contemplating whether he would make the first move for a kiss? These days, the minute you meet a guy...you are having to defend your personal space from having him move right on in.

I won't, however, blame this blog totally on the men we date...LOL.  Why is it that women feel comfortable having sex with men that they just met?  Don't get me wrong, this is definitely not a judgment call...but how did we get to the point that we find ourselves in bed with a stranger?  No, he may not be a stranger in the sense that we have no clue who this guy is but rather a stranger in the sense that we probably have hung out with him a couple of times...and maybe talked to him on the phone a couple of times..., yet he is still a stranger.  And then often we find ourselves disappointed or even dejected over the event.  Not to mention, sex with a stranger that isn't enjoyable sex is enough to make you want to slit your wrist.  But I digress!

I guess the point of this blog is to say, we all need to slow things down these days.  In the age of technology and easy access, we just don't want to provide easy access to ourselves, our body, our mind...our soul.  We need to learn to proceed with caution...keeping in mind, "everything that glitters ain't gold."  Never has a truer statement been said.  

Anyway...I think its time we take life slow.  And perhaps when something noteworthy comes a long...we won't miss it with the hustle and bustle of life's chaos.

"Birthday Blues for the Single Girl"

Hey world....

It's the eve of my birthday and I am looking forward to having dinner with friends. As I am getting ready for dinner, I am sitting here thinking about what this next year will mean...for the single girl who is still looking for love....hmmmm, one wonders. So while I have had the fortunate opportunity to share this weekend with those that I love, I find myself in the midst of reflection as I wonder...what's next?

Birthdays for the single girl who is in her thirties are what many would consider an extremely stressful time. Because while you have very special friends and family that value you and want to share in your day, they aren't quite as committed as you would have them be. For a person like me, birthdays are special times. I usually go out of my way to make others feel loved and valued. Yet, I went into this birthday weekend holding my breath and wishing it was over, because I knew that the investment in my day would be little to none.

So you may wonder why birthdays for the single girl are so stressful, well the time is spent wondering will you be alone on your birthday...will the people you care about actually show up...will the men you are seeing even give you a call (considering that most married men can't even remember their wives birthdays), and finally will this birthday be worthwhile? And after all of that, if the birthday isn't that great, what the heck does that say about the year to come?

Well, to my surprise, my birthday has been fine. My friends actually did show up, some of the guys actually did call...and I was made to feel special by those that love me. But for those of you that know some single woman who is nearing a birthday, keep this in mind and make it her best!

And that's straight out of the She-Spot!